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If I had to explain, you wouldn't want to know.


released March 22, 2013

Thanks to the late Terence McKenna.



all rights reserved



formerly known as
مذهب المتعة

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It's all too much but it's never enough
a carnival bazaar, buying, selling, trading stuff
playing hivemind games, calling my bluff
and pondering whether this traveller is rough enough...

green matrix beams converge, denoting two faces
I say that I'm lost, and they ask what my place is
and now I'm tongue-tied, no right or left side
two faces abreast; and yet no space occupied?
Jesters of telepathy, mind melding's got the best of me;
and I look upon the vision, completely mystified
gracefully they take a comprehensive acid test of me;
and politely advise me to open my eyes

In a sense, it became clear, we are not alive.
that's what I learned the first time that I died;
we all made the decision to consider our condition
flip the coin, begin the mission, to see what we'll see
to recall eternity, but watch life like television
or to participate, and forget that realm entirely.

Returning to normality, the piano weaves a threnody;
tendrils surround, the sound is bound in irony;
a love song, just for me, sent by infinity, celebrating
death in life, living death, absurdity;
at this point in time, it's a love story.

So I tried to run, tried to hide,
and I broke on through to the other side
tryin' a runnin' and I'm tryin' to hidin' and but I'm
breakin' on through, to the other side again,
You try to run, try to hide-
Break on through to the other side!

I thought I'd not return, but here we are, what do we see?
Nothing's changed, but rearranged, confident in my faculties;
And so when I returned, I thought I felt certain
That I'd at least just have a proper look behind the curtain;
and so... body melting and mind opening up to full flow:
polygonal pyramids multiply to fill my eyelids and
I'm feeling kind of stupid- or am I feeling wise? Is this the way the
world appears, seen through enlightened eyes? Transcending
physicality and soaring through the skies? From the ceiling of the universe
I fall; and I've seen more than I bargained for; and so I look around
to try and bolt the stable door... but the goose is loose, and I'm having a gander
through a dying italian woman's out of body mental camera...
questions of space, and I'm questioning time
when I realise it's time to raise some questions of mine-
but I came unequipped, I'm told I'm wasting their time
and there's no revelations now, no lessons, just questions
I'll have to figure out myself, back in realtime

Fingers burned, I decide
Maybe I should stay here, on the familiar side
Heed my warning, take care with my mind
so I resolved to keep to my own side


But though I'm tryin' to run, and yeah I try'a to hidin'in
I had to break back through to the other side again,
I tried to run, even thought I'd made up my mind
but I was drawn back in, in spite of the signs
You try to run, try to hide!
Break on through to the other side, break on through, to the other side...

An extradimensional bistro's in sight
I rap at the door, but they're closed for the night
and there's faeries and godesses around about the site
angels and whores looking out for a fight

and I'm struck by the feeling this doesn't seem right
like the time I saw the nurse on that dark summer night
a feminine presence presents me with scorn
I'm apologetic, but her temper is torn
delivering a warning in a language unformed
she asks if I'd a purpose, intruding before dawn;
She strikes a bargain, and as bargains go she drives a hard one
I begin to panic, try to get back through
and I recall the words I said, as I returned from in my head
"I choose to keep control, with all respect that's due;
I retain dominion over my own sanity; and I've no more business with you"